My friend Hyz's new/old tattoo

I'm going to see if this works by sharing it from yahoo. This is hyz's tat cover up job. I'm now accepting suggestions for my own ink. Anyway, this is her story in her own words (Exclusive to Adub's blog!):

"Okay, so here's the deal. I was 20 years old and 6 months into a rocky marriage. I was incredibly insecure and for some reason I figured that if my husband had my name tattooed on him, then he'd suddenly became unattractive to other women. So, that's what I requested for my birthday. Of course, he wasn't about to go through with it unless he got a label on me as well. I agreed, only fair, right? Now, just to clarify, I did come to my senses before I got his name tattooed on my lower back. However, when I tried to back out we ended up in an argument where there was no way for me to win, short of. Long story made short, 2 years later I had his name on the small of my back and was awaiting the finalization of my divorce. So although it's taken me two years to get his name covered, it's done now. And I'm very happy with the end result. Heh… when the ex saw it he said, "Well, that sucks. Where's my name?" Yeah… and his mom swears he's a genius. "

Ah, I love a good story. Although her "Okay, so here's the deal" is dangerously close to my blog's unofficial catchphrase "okay, so here's the thing". You eyeballing me? I've got my eye on you, punk!

Catching up

I've been staring at this screen for too long. So I think I'll just type nonsense. I went to Seaside for the weekend to celebrate Paul's thirtysomethingth birthday. I can't make fun of him for his age, because he looks younger than me and gets more women than I could dream about (well.. maybe not dream about...)

Hyz got her tattoo augmented. Let that be a lesson to you kids, never get someone's name on your body unless they've come FROM your body (that's one thing that can't be undone) I'll find a place to get the pic hosted and put it up here. Still, we have the whole "you get a tattoo, I get to get a tattoo" deal going, so I'll take any ideas what I should have done.

When I log into chatrooms, I usually go to LDS (mormon) chat. The downside to that is that sometimes it's full of idiots, rabid antimormons, and jesus crispies. Sometimes it's insane in there, and at those times, I just think of Buddy Cole or Gavin (the annoying kid), from "Kids in the Hall" and then I type anything that I can remember them having said... or anything I think they might say. Not only do I get to get into character, but usually people stare and actually try to make sense of it. Like this:

"It all reminds me of the time that Anne Murray and James Baldwin were sharing a smart cocktail at her cottage in Parry Sound. Anne said to James, It must be hard enough being black and gay... Imagine if you were also Canadian, eh?"

or

" There's this kid in my class, and she lives on her own without any parents or guardians, and she's eight. And she took the number off her house so the cops can't find her to take her to jail, and also, she took off the mailbox, so they can't send her a letter and say she's in trouble and has to go to jail.... and she's eight like I say."

or even,

"This kid at school, Raymond Snepts, the guy I told you about many times? D'you know what happened when he went away to the Soviet Union and was supposed to come back? He didn't. And d'you know who was in his desk? Another kid. And when they called out his name, when they called out "Raymond Snepts" at roll call, this new kid put up his hand. Scary, eh?"

The sad thing is, it's usually much more interesting than what's being said. Mormon people depress me a lot, sometimes.

Death Cab for Cutie: Redux

So, a few people have asked me what the best introduction to DCfC is. I'd recommend getting the album "We Have the Facts, and We're Voting Yes". If you're a suspicious dude like me, and prefer to download a few songs to see if you like it, I'd recommend the following tracks: "Why You'd Want To Live Here", "Styrofoam Plates", "405", "Company Calls Epilogue", "Death of and Interior Decorator". This will probably give you a pretty good idea of what the fuss is all about.

Even though it's a side project, the "Postal Service" album is also incredibly good. It has the DCfC lyrics and vocals sound over kind of an electronica background. I was moderately suprised I liked it.

re·dux (r-dks) adj. Brought back; returned. Used postpositively.

In Praise Of: Death Cab For Cutie

In my opinion, the best indie band out there (EAT IT, Belle and Sebastian!). I've been recommending this band to anyone who will listen to me for years. They're from Bellingham, Washington. The indie pop quartet Death Cab for Cutie began in 1997 as the solo project of singer/guitarist Ben Gibbard, who organized a full blown band after composing the band's first songs. Gibbard continues to have several side projects, most notably the recent release "Postal Service". The songs are very melodic and lyrically driven. I'd shudder to use the word "pop", so maybe I'll say "melodic emo" instead. If you're looking for an easily accessible introduction, buy "We Have the Facts, and We're Voting Yes", it's a great CD. And yes, it's supposed to sound like crap for the first minute or so, it's a joke and tribute to the earlier garage days of crappy muffled 4 track demos. They seem to favor very short album titles ("Transatlantacism" or "Photo Album") or very very long (the aforementioned "We Have the Facts, and We're Voting Yes", or "You Can Play These Songs With Chords"). Anyway, check them out, they're GREAT.

Things you might hear me say.

I'm fond of an entertaining turn of phrase, I think I might make a page of things you might hear me say. This is almost not passing the "Would anyone other than me give a rat's ass" test... but who knows. I'll throw this out to you, Constant Reader, and see if you have anything that I say that's stuck in your head. So, if you want to add... put a comment on here, and I'll stick it up in this post (and delete the comment).

Things you might hear me say or, the catchprases of Adub.

"Good times, noodle salad" (originally from "As Good As It Gets")

"There's the rub" (Shakespeare)

"I find you vulgar and offensive, yet I am drawn to you like moth to flame" (SNL)

"I'm sorry, I didn't hear that... all I heard was "blah blah blah, I'm a dirty tramp" (Mr Deeds, I think)

"Damn, got beat in the five hole again" (original)

"you no-talent ass clown" (Office Space)

Then there's a wide array of old rap lyrics. The interesting thing for me... try this yourself at home... but the interesting thing for me is just where some of these things come from that I say a lot. I'm not that big an Adam Sandler fan (then again, Kathy Bates says the line I like from Mr. Deeds), but it's funny how something that makes us smile rattles around in our heads like a bb in a spray paint can, then comes out at the most opportune moments.

A riddle.

This is funny.

Click here

This is funny on three levels, the first person who can correctly identify all three wins a prize. Maybe a big kiss, maybe a pizza (sans powdered sugar), maybe a movie or game from my collection. So tell your friends, and think hard, because you might have to dig a little here (ie, it's not exactly the pic that's funny).

How I view relationships, or: how to lose a girl in ten days.

I made a complete idiot of myself tonight. I was chatting with someone, and when they expressed concern over where our chat and relations were headed, and I made the all time genius comment of, "I'm not thinking about anything much more than "I wonder if talking to you is this good in person" , and then a comment that I found her attractive. She took it to meant I don't think about her at all in the long term.

I'm such a freaking idiot.

See, here's the thing. I've been in a few relationships where things have gone great... but I get so caught up in how awesome the future can be that I forget to tend to the present, and I fall flat on my face. One time I clicked with a girl so well and thought "man, we're going to be great together!" only to be a total space case on the first date and had nothing interesting to say... naturally, there wasn't a second date.

I TRY not to fantasize about the happily ever after part, no matter how much I wish or hope for it... because I want to make sure I make it to the next step (whatever that may be in any given situation). It's easy to fantasize about moving in and being together and then being a dud on a first date.. or saying something insensetive like I did. Mostly I try to keep my eyes focused on the trail in front of me, not at the top of the mountain.

So that's what I think about when I meet a new girl. I wish I could have said it like that. Of course I didn't... and I'm not taking bets on the odds of even a first date there. sigh. It's been a bad week for me, sorry about the low quality of my recent posts.

Beastie Boys: To The Five Boroughs

Most people who know me know I like the Beasties. After six years, they've released a new album, titled "To The Five Boroughs". I picked up a copy yesterday. Amazon says: "It's an up-tempo yet surprisingly homogenous assemblage of vintage electro-style party beats, and it's a strictly Beastie affair: the Boys co-wrote and produced each track themselves, which means that it sports none of the sonic fripperies and quirky collaborations that distinguished previous classics such as Paul's Boutique." Which was a little bit of a shame since I loved Paul's Boutique... but then I also loved Hello Nasty, and this album seems to follow in it's footsteps nicely.

It's good to toss in an album of hip hop that hasn't forgotten what the point of rap is: to break some beats, say your peace, and make the bodies move. You can take your Jay-Z and your drrrrrty south, I'm not interested in your bling bling or what size rims you're rolling on. Come on, think anyone is going to remember 50 Cent in ten years? The Beastie Boys, Public Enemy, Run DMC... these guys made (and make) rap music that means something more than a blip on MTV and record sales. The only time any of the new rap generation has done something worth remembering is when they've been shot and killed.

Typing

The Lakers lost, for this I am glad. I hate that fat retarded gorilla Shaq with a passion. I only hope this is a sign of bigger and more interesting things to come for the NBA. Most of my readership doesn't care a whole lot about sports... but hey, it's my blog after all.

I wish I had some big long entry full of deep things or exciting news... but things aren't really aces for me at the moment. Count your blessings that I am out of bed. That's really the only place I want to be.

'I kind of think bumper stickers are like this big banner that says "Hey, let's never hang out"... "And that goes for your honor roll son too" '

Flying My Guilt Over a Quilt

I've had a few questions about the title of the last entry, they're lyrics from the Jason Mraz song I mentioned entitled, "Flying My Guilt Over a Quilt" It's not on any of his albums, it's a new song. You can download a live accoustic version of it HERE at the bottom of the page...(don't worry, live recordings like this are legal MP3s, so enjoy and don't sell!) And you can find the lyrics to it HERE

If the plane goes down... down, down... I will remember where the love was found.

So here's the thing. I had a fun "oh he's just my platonic friend" date this weekend. I want and saw Jason Mraz's "Curbside Prophets" show. Unbelieveable talent. Did dinner and such before hand where the highlights in conversation included:

"You know, I really wouldn't have any problems killing someone" -her

"You know, mormon girls really are very boring... I mean, what am I gonna do, talk about scrapbooking? Oh, present company excepted." - me

*someone throws a flower lei on stage, Jason puts it on the mike stand* "Oh cool, someone gave me a lei... it's been too long..." - Jason Mraz

*girl playing percussion comes up toward front, Jason puts the lei on her, someone in the crowd shouts* "HEY, THAT WASN'T FOR YOU!" -Mouthy Concert Girl.

I was also someone suprised to hear one of my favorite catch phrases "good times, good times" also used a bit by Jason Mraz. Of course, I take mind from "As Good As It Gets". I have no idea where he gets his from. The show itself was really good, I think my favorite song he played was "Flying My Guilt Over a Quilt", I've had it in my head most of the weekend. Spending time with Ashley always makes me think. It's kind of like spending time with a few of my other really high quality LDS women friends... Being around them gives me hope that perhaps there might be someone of the artistic and intellectual capacity that I crave wrapped up in a nice convinient LDS wrapper. Sometimes I wondered if I was going to have to "settle" or divorce my romantic pursuits from the interactions that I have with my closer friends. I guess I start to wonder what it is I lack. I suppose it's more of a rhetorical question, as my problems and faults are pretty well documented. But I guess I wonder what it is that makes us overlook people. I always wondered why Zannah and I never really tried anything (though there's more of a scheduling issue there, as we weren't ever single and on the same continent at the same time)... and it's not that I wish last night were some big romantic thing, or that I had one of my other friends realize I'm the best thing since saltines, it's just that when things are really good, I guess that which is missing just gets highlighted a little bit. It continued getting highlighted throughout the course of the weekend.

I didn't know I could be happy and lonely at the same time.

The last quote of the night comes from me (I'm so quotable): "All of us, we're on this earth for really such a very short time. Much to short for any of us to be casual with our love." I'm not sure what that means... but the words jump out at me now. Maybe it makes sense to you?

I'm sitting here staring at this page.

Sometimes I have bloggers block. Lots of things happen, but few things pass the "would I be the only one who gives a crap about this?" test. I promised myself a few things when I started this blog... and it kind of degenerated into a set of rules I try to live by on here.

1) I wouldn't ever post an entire song's lyrics so "show how I feel" or some nonsense.

2) I would try to refrain from having too many of those "I did ____ today blah blah blah" kinds of entries.

3) I thought I would avoid religious or political discussion, as I'm a bit of a cynic on both topics.

Though now, the more I think about it, the more I reserve the right to break any rules at any time I feel like it.

Oh, and my parent's anniversary was today... congrats to them... 35 years. Not that they read this...and perhaps that's for the best.

I need to remember this...

"We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory will swell when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature.”

Abraham Lincoln said this. I wanted to put this on here so I had a convinent place to look at it when I wanted to. I have much on my mind, and at the moment I would very much like to be swayed by the better angels of my nature.

Pictures of Birthday and Skye's gig

I took pics this weekend, anyone interested in checking them out, can go to the link at the right and check them out!

The days are just packed.

Well, it was my birthday this weekend, so I was out and about a lot. There was much socializing, and good times were had by all. I usually try to avoid the travelogue thing on this site, but thanks to all who were involved and all that good stuff. I am falling behind on here! I have tons of pics from this weekend to label and get up... priorities, priorities.

One major happening this weekend was music related. Not only did Skye have her first gig in quite a while (a rousing success), but I met a new artist by the name of Stacy Unck. She's another accoustic singer songwriter, with a little bit of an R&B flavor (think Jewel, I guess). She's looking to develop some songs and play out, and I'm going to play bass for her. We're not aiming for the stars like Skye is, just wanting to get out and make a little music. I'm excited for it, though.. as I love making sweet sweet music. I'll keep y'all posted.

A new opportunity.

Had lunch with Skye today, and among other things, we discussed the offer she's made to me to manage part of her music career. It's a heady thing, because while I've never had difficulty accomplishing anything I've tried to do, this is someone else's dream. I never worry normally, because if something goes awry, I live with the consequences. With this, however, if I screw up, it's someone else's dream that suffers. Obviously the main answer is not to screw up. I'm looking forward to having an opportunity to focus my artistic energy on something real and living.

Rarely do I quote myself, but I said something at lunch that has kind of rattled around in my brain, like a BB in a spray paint can. Skye is uncomfortable I think about asking people to take on things just for her. I said something to the effect of, the reason any of us are going to be doing this Skye street team thing (www.skyepixton.com) and promoting her band is because we love her, and we want to make her dreams come true. Do any of us really care primarily about the music? I mean obviously it helps, but she could be trying to start a hip hop group, and if she believed in it as much as she does this, we'd want to help her.

How many of us do things because love is really our sole motivation? How many parties have we gone to, how many stupid choices have we endured, how many parents have we met out in the boonie end of Hermiston, Oregon because we love someone? I use the word love very loosely. I learned that from a girl name Cara when I was in high school. We hung out once or twice, and as I was dropping her off she gave me a big hug and told me that she loved me. I thought about it a lot then, and still do sometimes. We should tell people we love them more. I tend to wait till the timing is right with my friends, so it has meaning, and I think that's fine... but gosh, I know I'd feel a lot less lonely if I heard it more. I wonder how many other people would too?

Boy meets grill.

I love to barbeque.

Flame, raw meat, marinades, spices, I love it. I love watching shows on the food network (aka porn for fat people). I love honing the skills. So last night I went to my friend Kedra's birthday party and they were going to barbeque. Now, this will sound sexist, but I have yet to meet a woman that's knowledgeable in the ways of the grill. It's usually all like "um, so you turn it on and then throw the meat on... rrright?".

Sigh.

So I got my grill on. I prepared for this probability by whipping up some generic steak rub: corn starch, black pepper, season salt, garlic salt, crushed bullion, oregano, chili powder, onion powder... shake it all up and rub it on. And low, I did grilleth steaks, burgers, whipped up some grilled cajun shrimp, even did corn on the cob for Rich... And the Lord did grin and the people did feast. And there was much rejoicing. Truth be told, I'm poor, and I figured making sure the barbequing went well was the least I could do for Kedra's birthday. So, for those of you not wise in the ways of the grill, let me kick the beat a little something like this, and learn ya:

JAMES' COMMANDMENTS OF GRILLING:

1) When thou grillest a steak or chicken and remove it from the grill, thou shalt let it sit for no less than five minutes. This lets the steak finish cooking and the juices evenly distribute themselves. Fish does not need to rest and should be served immediately, as it loses heat very quickly.

2) Thou shalt not play with thy meat, lest thy go blind (just kidding, that's a myth). This includes picking it up to see if it’s done on the bottom, moving it around, and turning it over every ten seconds. Put the food down and give it a chance to cook. This will give it a chance to sear on the bottom so that it naturally pulls away from the grates and doesn’t stick. If you try to move the food before it’s seared on the bottom, it will definitely stick. This is important with Chicken and fish. Oiling the grill also keeps things from sticking.

3) Thou shalt not cut into your food to see if it’s done. For one thing, it doesn’t really work, since you can’t get a good look at the inside anyway. For another, it lets the juices come pouring out and the food dries out on the grill. The best way to test food is by poking it with your finger. As it cooks, it becomes firmer and firmer. A rare steak feels squishy; a medium steak feels more springy; a well-done steak feels very firm.

4) Thou shalt clean thy grill. This is what a scraper and wire brushes are for. It's easier to do as te grill is cooling down. A clean grill cooks cleanly, and doesn't make your food dirty. This also increases the life of the grill. Seeing an old neglected grill that's never been cleaned is like seeing a hot girl on the street light up a cigarette then wave her positive HIV test at you.. it's just sad.

5) Have fun. Grilling is art and finesse, not science. Once you're comfortable you'll learn that recipies are not instruction manuals that need to be followed down to every last detail. Then your food can truly become a creation of your own. That rub I mentioned earlier.. I literally got a spoon out and threw it together. Why? Because after a while you just know what works.

Thus endth mine epistle of the grill.

And it was good.

Blog Quandry

So, here's the thing. I have online friends, old friends (many of whom I keep in touch with via online means) and real life friends. Since I put the art night pics up most of my real life friends have visited my website at one time or another. Not that I'd vent about them specifically, but never before has the possibility of something I toss out into cyberspace coming back to haunt me really existed before. To my blogging type friends, is this something you think about, or is it more damn the torpedos, full speed ahead?

To be honest, I like it. I never liked the idea that being online is this shady alter ego life, I value it as a communication resource and tool of expression. I like being able to connect with people. I've really liked emailing my "real life" friends lately, instead of waiting till we hang out or run into each other. I also really like having in depth exchanges with people that I haven't really connected with before, and in doing so making better friends. I am having trouble expressing why this makes me feel so good at the moment, but it does. Good times, noodle salad.